The decline in jumping standards

Once upon a time, it happened that all the Newspaper Editors, Employers and Professors of Engineering throughout the land came to believe that children were no longer able to jump as well as they had in the old days, when the Newspaper Editors, Employers and Professors of Engineering themselves had been young. Overcome by a deep sense of concern at such a decline from the high standards they themselves had set, and anxious to convince the few remaining doubters of the superiority of their own generation over that of the present day, they secured the appointment of a Committee of Inquiry into the Jumping Ability of Schoolchildren.